what I'll miss

Doing a post on the things I'll miss about Kijabe could be a recipe for disaster: the things I'll miss are legion, and I'm afraid I may go on and on about it.  I'll try not to! Some things have been mentioned before, or go without saying: this community that surrounds us, especially friends Francis & Evelyn, the weather (back-to-back-to-back perfect summer days right now is hard to be beat), and then, when the weather turns cold, our fireplace to keep us warm, our house and yard, and so on.  But here are a few things that I may not have mentioned...

Yesterday & today, Dexter took Kyalo with him in the morning to the dental clinic.  Their day starts out with one hour of devotions, which gives me time to get things done without having Kyalo underfoot - or being afraid of waking him up. {A workout, some cleaning, work, etc}.

But more than that, most days, Dexter leaves at about 7:58 for the long walk down to the clinic to be there by 8. He comes home for lunch most days.  And I would say I pop in on the clinic 2-3 times each week to say hello to him and the folks he works with.  I'm guessing that I can't just show up while he's in class for a quick "hello."?  Lately I've been going on my afternoon walk a little bit later, so Kyalo and I go to pick him up and escort him home.

In our three years of marriage, we have lived and worked in the same place...having lunch together, walking to work together, etc. We're heading into the real world now, I guess, and I can't say I'm excited!

We get our fruits and veggies from the local "duka" (shop) just down the road, and Kyalo and I often find ourselves there, getting our onions and tomatoes, etc.  I love that the ladies who sell the veggies love Kyalo.  One even sings Kikuyu praise songs to him, and another almost always gives me an extra banana (for free!) just for him.  It is these little things that make life here both wonderful and quaint.

When we're on our daily walks, Kyalo and I will often bump into people we know.  We stop and have a quick chat and then go on our way.  I think little encounters like that -- even though they're brief and random -- have kept me from feeling too lonely or isolated here in Kijabe. 

Chai.  I love this milky tea that Kenyans have. Dexter and I put rosemary in it from our rosemary bush (just about the only successful thing we've grown), and it tastes so good to me.  Sure, we can make it in the States, with the tea from Kenya but somehow it just doesn't taste the same. I think the American milk has too much "stuff" in it - or the cows are eating vastly different things.

Other little things:
- hanging laundry to dry {yes, I really like to do that!}
- walking everywhere {which may, or may not, have something to do with my refusal to drive anywhere in Kenya.}
- the simple living we do here without even really trying

There's probably a lot more I could say here, but I'll leave it at that, as Kyalo and I are heading out on one of our afternoon walks.  I'll do a post about what I'm looking forward to in the US, too, just to keep things fair. 

whoops!

I forgot to post a picture of our happy little ranger from the weekend away.  Can't resist sharing it now.

 January 27, 2012

{perhaps he's excited about new cousin Vera Evangeline Mering coming in on the 27th}

Note the hands...he's finally clapping and he's doing it non stop now.  It seems to go well with his happy, easy-going personality.

We love this park ranger!

getaway

This weekend, we were going to go back to the UAE.  The main reason for this was to see this girl:

Shiny & me, Sept 2009

The Green House {let's have a moment of silence, as they tore our house down moments after we moved out!}

{not our best photo}

Shiny was practically our only friend in the UAE, and became a part of our little family.  We did so much together, and she's getting married in March. We would have loved to get back out there to catch up, hear about wedding plans, etc. Plus, I think I had all our meals mapped out for the time we were to be there.

But it wasn't to be. Reality checked in and we realized that time-money-energy is all running short, and it wouldn't be wise to go.  I'm still very sad about that.

Still, we needed a little getaway, a quick little jaunt out of Kijabe.  Dexter took Friday off from work and we went to Mbweha Camp for the night. This is a hotel (? can you call it that?) just outside of Lake Naurku National Park, in a private conservancy.  We spent a few nights in one of their partner places in the Mara during our honeymoon so knew we'd be in for a treat.  {Should you ever be in Kenya, I'd recommend it!}

We left in the wee hours of the morning to get a little game drive through the park in.  

Lake Nakuru

I'll never get tired of this view - even IF the pink flamingos have fled the scene.

When we went in October we didn't see giraffe too closely and as we were talking about that sad truth we stumbled upon these guys!

Dexter was being artistic with Kyalo's stuffed giraffe.  Here he is, looking out at his real counterpart.

After tooling around in the park for a bit we headed to the camp for lunch.  I completely forgot to take pictures of our cute little cottage, or of much else, really. I guess I was too busy relaxing! Even though we didn't do much while we were gone, it really felt like a nice escape.

This morning, before checking out, I wanted to get some photos of me and Dexter with Kyalo (feels like it had been a while), and it was at that moment that our camera's auto-focus decided to stop working {anyone know what we can do about that?}, so I wasn't sure how the photos would turn out. I think we still managed to get some keepers.

There was a little bridge right near our room, and I thought it would be cute to get some pictures there. They didn't turn out quite like I expected - the lighting was wrong (hello shadows) and Kyalo a bit uncooperative (hello squirmy) - but we did okay. 

I love these pictures of Dexter & Kyalo together.  Lots of love passing between these guys.

I also love vacation!

six weeks. . .

Six weeks from today we'll be heading to Nairobi with our suitcases and all our worldly possessions (hoping that they meet weight requirements for BA) to begin yet another adventure.  Yesterday Dexter and I were talking about how we've been in Kijabe about a year a half, and when we came, we really didn't know what to expect.  I guess this is par for the course for us, because we certainly don't know what to expect in Newark.  Aside from the fact that Dexter will be in a rigorous program, we can't even begin to predict what life will be like.  At the moment, we have no place to live, no furniture, no friends, no church, etc.  To say this feels daunting is a big understatment.

But.

In 2005, I moved to Kenya site unseen, with no friends, no idea what I would be doing, to start a job that previously hadn't existed. And look how well that worked out for me. So, hard as this is -- and it is painfully hard to begin yet another round of goodbyes -- I know that, as we go with God, He will take care of us and provide for us what we need (and even want) just when we need it.

There's a lot -- a LOT -- to do in the next six weeks.  We're going away the next two weekends (yay!...I'll recap later), my parents and two of their friends come for about 10 days at the end of February to do Gentle Bells things, oh, and we need to pack up, sort through our stuff, sell things, and actually move on out.  And most importantly, we need to be spending time with friends and family before we go.  Maybe we just won't sleep.

Now, who wants to come help us pack?  I'll make you chai!

One of the many things I'll miss about Kijabe is views like this:

The sun setting over Mt. Longonot

(photos taken May 2010)

I love these photos because of their beauty, but also because it feels like God is reaching down to touch us.  For me this is a good reminder that He is with us.  It may not feel like it always, I may forget, but He is.  For that, I am grateful.

Should you think of it, if you could pray that we find a decent (two-bedroom?) apartment somewhere close enough to school so that Dexter doesn't have a huge commute, and one that has a reasonable rent rate, we'd be grateful.  It will be so different living in the US with BILLS.  Here in Kenya we're living in a three bedroom house on a pretty decent piece of land, and the "rent" we pay (taken out of Dexter's salary) is about $150/month.  What can we get for $150 in the US? :)  We have lots of adjustments ahead.

just because

It has been a little while since I've put up a picture of Kyalo and I didn't want you to think I was going to give that up. Never! Just had a few things to work through on this here blog. 

A random assortment of pictures from the last 10 days. . .

personal hygiene is very important to Kyalo - wants to keep his breath minty and his teeth white. never mind that he doesn't have any.  And, *ahem*, he might be using Papa's old toothbrush.  But that's besides the point.

enjoying watermelon

He really loves fruit, and I gave him a piece (seeds removed) yesterday and was able to get a few things done without him directly underfoot.  

(too many mango pictures? sorry)

Dexter got a whole bunch of mangoes from a hospital employee for about 35 CENTS and so we've been enjoying a lot of ripe, juicy, flavorful mango around here. We talk about making juice or sorbet with them, but they're so good as they are it is hard to imagine we'll get to that.  Kyalo certainly enjoys them . . .even if he makes a huge mess of himself.

{future dry cleaner, perhaps?}

Kyalo likes to make sure the machine is washing his clothes properly!  I love this photo.  How cute does he look in his new jeans from Grandma? (Yes, grandma, they're a little long, but he'll grow into them soon enough. I couldn't wait to get him in them!)

* A little update about sleep.  Already, it is getting better!  I guess I just needed to have some pep talks from other mothers, and accept that it would be HARD.  No sleeping through the night yet (that would be too perfect) but naps are getting longer, and the time he sleeps at night is extended.  I feel so much better, and I think Kyalo seems happier.  Thanks for your words of encouragement or your prayers.  It has certainly helped!

sleep

I miss it. Oh, how I miss it.

Kyalo has not once slept through the night. And if he's slept six hour stretches it is but a distant memory.  Lately, getting him to nap has been a huge battle (he's screaming as I type), and then often only lasts between 30 & 40 minutes once he does fall asleep.  {He used to sleep over an hour; I don't know what happened.}

So, I'm tired.

And I don't know what to do about it.  My gut tells me to stay away from the "cry-it-out" system because it is just so awful.  He stands in his crib, his head barely peeking over the railing, red faced, and tear streaked.  It is more than this mama can handle.  At the same time, I'm having a hard time with NO time to do things -- a sink full of dishes, some work for CURE, a nap for myself.  Night is only slightly better. I can get him to sleep between 6 and 7 most days, which is great...but he still wakes up several times.  I don't mind him waking when I'm still awake, but I sure would love it if he could go from 12 PM - 6 AM on a regular basis. Six hours! Six!! That can't be too much to ask for, right?

I'm sure that I've done everything wrong...I nurse him to sleep, I go to him just about as soon as I hear him crying, I haven't seemed to get any good systems in place.  It doesn't help, either, that he seems to be the lightest sleeper in the world.  We have a fan going, the door to his room shut, and the door to the hallway shut, and still the slightest bang, a too-loud voice, a door opening or closing, a monkey running on the roof, and he is awake, and won't hear about going back to sleep. We do our best to keep noises to a minimum.  We whisper, tip toe around the house, I put my phone on silent, don't play music, don't flush the toilet. Anything to avoid the dreaded too-early wake up. 

I had no idea this sleep thing would be so hard.  It seems like it is going to be the undoing of my mothering!

Last night -- on the advice of a seasoned mother -- I sent Dexter in with a bottle of water when he woke at four. All that meant was he was awake for an hour and a half, and Dexter, who has to go to see patients all day, suffered. {I was actually sleeping, so it was okay for me}.

I've just let him cry for close to thirty minutes - every scream filled minute torture for me - and it seems he's finally settling down.  I'd love to go cover him with a blanket, make sure he's cozy, but I know that will wake him up, too.  I just can't win!  So, we'll see if he sleeps for more than thirty minutes. 

Those of you who are moms out there, what have you done that has worked (or didn't work)? How long would you be willing to let your baby cry?  One book I read said up to an hour which just seems horrific (for the mother, more than anything.)

I'm off to get some things done while the babe sleeps - I just never know how much time I will have!

Thanks for listening to my rant...just wanted to get it recorded, and off my chest.

home

I've been thinking a lot about "home" these past few weeks. It probably has something to do with the fact that I'm once again packing up a home and moving elsewhere, and the fact that we purchased our one-way tickets to the US last week.  In times past, I would have immediately thought of this as a homecoming. Any time I go to the US for a holiday, I say, "I'm going home." But suddenly, I'm moving back there, and it doesn't feel like so much like home.

Granted, we're moving to New Jersey, a place I've never been, where I know few people, and don't know which grocery store is the best, where the library is, or any of those other details that make a place home.  Plus, I've been living overseas for close to seven years, and in two vastly different countries during that time.

When I think about "home" my first thought is usually the house in Essex where I grew up.  My parents moved out of that house about 10 years ago, and still I dream about it!  What makes a place truly home for me, though, is the community that I have.  My parents are surrounded by their best friends in Essex. Most have lived in their houses for 40+ years, and growing up in that kind of community set the standard pretty high, and it is something I've always longed for.

Kijabe is probably about the closest thing I'll ever have to that kind of community. Everyone is within walking distance, we have meals together with our closest friends at least once a week, the focus is relationships.  It is hard to once again give this up to start to find and establish a new home.

Home is where the heart is, they say, and so my heart remains firmly rooted in Kenya, but I leave pieces of it everywhere I go...in Oakland...in Al Ain...in Essex. We will be in New Jersey for at least two years. A lot can happen in two years, I know. (That's all the time I needed to meet and fall in love with Dexter, after all!) I hope and pray that NJ will be a home for us in a new way, even as Kenya remains our HOME. 

There is much I will miss about Kenya, and also a lot I'm looking forward to in the US. I'll talk about those in future posts (so I remember, more than anything).

We're in for an adventure!

baby boom

On Wednesday, our Bible Study resumed after a little Christmas break.  It is always a wonderful time of fellowship, food, laughter, and {some} focus.  We alternate weeks - one week prayer & praise, and the next week going through a study guide. We decided to ease back into things with a prayer and praise night.   I thought it would be a good idea to have the group praying for the four women I know who are scheduled to deliver in January.  They are: sister-in-law Helen, sister-in-law Noelle, cousin-in-law Oli, and our good friend Sarah.  Three of the four have had serious complications in previous pregnancies, and so wanted God's protection and peace to surround them.

That night, as Dexter and I climbed into bed about 11 PM, we both commented about how tired we felt {yes, we're old. Shh} and about two minutes later, Dexter's phone rang: Helen was feeling the labor pains and wanted to come to Kijabe right then.  She was scheduled for a C-section on the 18th, so we were hoping we could get her to wait at least until the morning to make the hour + journey to the hospital.  But, it wasn't to be. That baby wanted out!  Unfortunately, Helen's husband Robert was in the Mara doing a game drive, and not able to be there that night.

Helen made the arduous journey from her house to the hospital after midnight.  The roads here are AWFUL, especially the 3-mile downhill stretch to the hospital. Pot hole city. At every bump, she had a contraction. Ugh.

Other than that little (uncomfortable) hitch, all went well.  And in the early morning hours of January 5, 2012, {also Helen's birthday!!} Nadia Kamy Ndeto made her appearance. 

 3.1 kgs, 6.8 pounds

{sweetness}

Dexter stumbled back into bed around 3AM and tried to get some sleep before a long day at work.  Because Helen had a C-S she was in the hospital for a few days, so we got a lot of time to visit with her and baby Nadia.

Helen came in a rush to the hospital, and didn't have time to pack her bag for the baby. She thought she had a few more days for that!  I lent her some of Kyalo's newborn clothes for the first couple of days. I can't believe Kyalo once wore this little star outfit. So tiny!

I love baby feet! So precious.

 big brother Aidan

ah, the beauty of a sleeping babe

love this photo!

*even though he looks like he's grimacing, Robert really is happy! :)

And in other news, our friend Sarah had her baby on January 6! A little girl named Imani.  I think Noelle and Oli should start getting things in order...the prayers of our Bible Study work overtime!

After spending a couple of days with such a tiny baby, I got a little nostalgic for the new born days of Kyalo. He was such a floppy little guy!

swimming

Monday was a holiday here...the last slow, easy day before Dexter had to return to a full schedule at work.  We had talked about going to a golf club for swimming with some friends, but that didn't work out. It was a gorgeous day here, so we improvised, taking a basin out in the sun and throwing Kyalo's swim suit on him. He had a great time splashing around in the sun. I think we were outside for six hours straight!  I told you this boy loves to be outside!  Not a bad way to end the holiday frenzy.

This was Dexter's idea, actually, and such a good one!  Kyalo really enjoyed himself, and it was truly relaxing.  Observe:

If only we could get him to kick back and relax a little, huh?

The sun was out and very hot, so we needed to protect his baby skin.  We're good parents like that!

not exactly a beach umbrella, but it did the job

We even had lunch in the shade outside, too. I made a chickpea patty thing (which was tasty, but a little more labor intensive than I would have liked), which I think Kyalo liked.  He got into, anyway.

I'm never sure just how much he eats since it seems to end up all over his face, his hair, his body, and the ground.  At least he's being exposed to lots of new flavors and textures - that counts for something, right?

After lunch we lounged around, enjoying the fresh air, sunshine, and slow pace.  And Kyalo had lots of stories for me.

I love holidays!

nine months

Are you as amazed as I am that Kyalo's clocked nine months already?  I don't know what's more amazing...that he is now nine months, or we only have three to go before he is one YEAR. yikes.  Cliche though it may be, the time really is going so fast. I was looking at some pictures of him as a newborn the other day, and couldn't believe just how small he was.  He's grown so much.

Getting these monthly pictures is quite the ordeal now. Him sitting serenely on the couch is a thing of the past.  I do my best to catch him in the seconds he sits still.  That didn't work so well yesterday, so I cheated (shhh) and took some more today. I'll give you a selection of both. Hope it isn't too much!

First, the photos from yesterday, his actual 9 month birthday.

Is it wrong that this photo kinda makes me think of a puppy? This is a fairly common sight in our house: Kyalo crawling around with something (usually a clothes pin) in his mouth.  Hilarious.

He was weighed yesterday - 8.6 kgs (18.98 lbs) and measured 70 cms/27.5 inches (we hope). He also got his measles shot, which he handled fairly well. The worst part about that was the nursing student who jabbed him about five times before a nurse took over and did it in one clean jab.  Whew.

The shots from today:

 {chubby}

Kyalo continues to bring us so much joy.  He is generally happy and easy going...no sense of stranger danger yet.  He's easy to please and entertain.  This last month didn't seem to have as many milestones in it, but he did have his first fever on Christmas day {awesome}, which meant for a couple of sleepless nights for us.  I had a bit of an exhaustion-induced meltdown one night, but other than that, we survived!  He has no teeth yet (I thought maybe the fever was a precursor to a tooth breaking through. I thought wrong), and still does not sleep through the night. Other than that little hiccup, he's perfect.

And we love him no matter what!